I Think Harry Potter Hates Me...

Ok, completly random... but I'm pretty sure Harry Potter hates me... last night.... er, this morning, when I got in after breakfast with the Denny's crew and had to pee REALLY badly, so I dropped my stuff on the ground in the hallway, however, Harry Potter and the Half Blooded Prince drops RIGHT on my big toe!!! Sooooooooo not cool, and this morning.... er evening, it still kills to walk on or touch... *sigh* I should call into work!! lol!!

OK, STILL haven't gotten ahold of Shay'y, this is starting to concern me... but I leave in Edmonton for two days, AND Jen's comming with!! HURRAY!!!! Excited, have to admit was kinda looking forward to the drive alone, but this'll be better!! We could BOTH use the time off!!

Sooo... I need a place to vent and try and figure things out, so this is the place. back in what... March... ya, March, I dated this guy... which was, well off, because I didnt' want to date anyone, but we met in a concert, adn there was this instant connection, and I was instantly comfortable with him, then BAM, we were dating... now once we started dating, I kinda started resisting the idea of it, and liking him and such, and the stupid pisces noticed, and talked to me about it, and basically told me not to be scared, he wasn't going to hurt me, and what was so bad about falling in love... so I did. Which i know sounds stupid cause we weren't dating that long, but it was the connection. Things were wonderful, we always had SSSOOOO much fun, everywhere, together, with other ppl, it was awesome. And then one day, outa the blue, he just ended it. ANd since then I've slowly pieced together that I was used, and pretty well a means to an end... he needed a change in life, and I was the way to do it... so once my purpose was served, that was the end of that. Now, as many of you know, I have a new spark in my life... he asked me out yesterdya, and I talked to him for quite some time about it, just cause like always theres complications, and I being an EXCEPTIONALLY blunt person, outright told him I didnt' want to be one of his whores... however all in all, we decided it was a good idea... and then I start doing it again... instantly distant, resistant... like, wtf?!?? I've liked this guy for sooooooo long now, and then BAM, changed my mind.... *GRRRRRR!* So... why? Am i just afraid to fall for him and be ditched? I doubt my feelings could've randomly changed so quickly... so waht the hell is wrong with me? *sigh* i dont get it... at all. Am I just a bitter person, who feels the need to inflict it on the world?

YAY! Just got a txt msg from Shay'y... i think this might mean contact and planning.

Anwyays, tonight, stupid Mike and Stan got the night off, so they and Diana (Stan's wife) are going bar hopping!! Grrr to them... and then, THEN, they're comming into Denny's afterwards... we hates them!! We hates them sooooo bad.

Ok, well sorry about the above vent, but I think Edmonton will help, just give me time to think things through... all that good stuff. But i unfortunatly, and unlike Mike and Stan, have to work tonight, and have to accomplish things before I get there... so i bid yee all good night, and adieu.